Paganistan: Notes from the Secret Commonwealth

In Which One Midwest Man-in-Black Confers, Converses & Otherwise Hob-Nobs with his Fellow Hob-Men (& -Women) Concerning the Sundry Ways of the Famed but Ill-Starred Tribe of Witches.

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The Realest Magic

You laugh. Go ahead. It doesn't change the truth of what I say.

Among the most potent of all magical tools is the clipboard.

Believe me when I tell you that with this clipboard in hand, I, middle-aged white guy, can go anywhere.


With this in my hand, I could walk into the room where they keep all the money, and no one would stop me.

Not only would no one stop me, but they would avert their eyes as I did it.

You don't want to make eye contact with Clipboard Guy. You do not.

Invisibility, impunity, ability to instill fear: these are the powers bestowed by the magic clipboard.

Who needs a Hand of Glory?

You've got your pentacles, you're got your magic wands. For real power, give me a clipboard, any day of the moon.

As always, the realest magic is where you find it.


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Poet, scholar and storyteller Steven Posch was raised in the hardwood forests of western Pennsylvania by white-tailed deer. (That's the story, anyway.) He emigrated to Paganistan in 1979 and by sheer dint of personality has become one of Lake Country's foremost men-in-black. He is current keeper of the Minnesota Ooser.


  • Anthony Gresham
    Anthony Gresham Monday, 08 April 2019

    There was a guy in the warehouse today. Vaguely familiar, I think I've seen him before, wearing a yellow safety vest and holding a clipboard. I don't know who he was or why he was there, but he was taking notes on his clipboard and everyone left him alone.

  • Steven Posch
    Steven Posch Monday, 08 April 2019

    Damn, Anthony! You mean you didn't recognize me?!?

  • Kile Martz
    Kile Martz Wednesday, 10 April 2019

    It's rumored that Marvel was about to green light a new super hero series about a guy with a clipboard, glasses, and a badge. Stan Lee himself cancelled the project and said "Are you crazy, the guy has no weaknesses!"

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