Solitary: A Self-Directed Spiritual Life

Let's talk. Come sit with me under a tree or by a lake while we chat about being alone in our practice and our beliefs. Solitary practitioners choose this path for many reasons and have a unique perspective. As a solitary witch, I want to share how I keep true to my beliefs and practices whether I'm working on my own, in a small group or attending a large group gathering. Author of Moon Affirmations, meditations based on the phase of the moon.

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Black Friday Shopping

I’m sorry to say I went black Friday shopping.  My daughter wanted to go and she dragged me along.  I didn’t mind the craft stores but the others were too much.  Winter is a time to go within and reflect on what’s needed.  Black Friday shopping is definitely not anywhere near an internal reflective state.

While one of my daughters was home for Thanksgiving we went and did things almost non-stop.  We ran errands, cooked food, went to a movie.  It was go go go from the time she got home.  It made me cranky. 


When she left, I felt like a tornado had blown through.  I took a day to catch my breath and find my balance again.  Finding that balance isn’t always easy. 


As a solitary and an introvert, the best way for me to find my balance is to spend some time alone doing something soothing for me.  In my world, this means crocheting or writing.  If I can get outside – which is hard for me at the best of times – just being in nature helps.  In my backyard, I have large trees full of birds and critters.  Sitting on my deck watching their movement shifts my focus from the frantic pace of the outside world to a calmer place.  However, it’s November – outside was not really a choice. 


After my daughter left, I spent the rest of the day crocheting.  When I crochet, I go to a different place.  I worked on a piece of lace for one of my daughters.  By focusing on my crocheting, I stopped being stressed from all the crazy external activities we had done and shifted to the intent I wanted to put into the crocheted item. 


My thoughts went from frazzled to how I wanted the lace panel to look, how I wanted to please my daughter who will sew it into a piece of clothing, and how much it means for me to make her the item. 


The intent in making an item is important.  In a way, I’m making an item which she will wear and hopefully enjoy.  I’m infusing it with my love and protection so my daughter can feel it when she wears it. 


By infusing my homemade items with the energy, I’m passing along the positive energy in the item.  At the same time, I’m finding my balance and returning to my center.  Crocheting like sitting in nature changes my mental state from stressed to calm, from outwardly focused to inwardly focused.  It changes how I think, how I feel, and how I react. 


Like a breath of fresh air, crocheting eases me.  Other tasks can have the same affect.  Writing, meditation, holding a baby, rocking in a rocking chair, sitting in nature, and creating (either by cooking or doing some other craft) all have a similar effect on me.   


The physical affect can be gauged by pulse and breathing rates and blood pressure.  The mental affect takes me from stressed, negative, and angry to calm, settled, and balanced. 


So I’ve managed to put black Friday behind me.  I’ve found my balance and center again.  Next year, I think I’ll tell my daughter we should do fewer things – especially less shopping.  


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As a solitary, I consider myself a pagan witch who is seeking. Residing in rural Wisconsin, by day I work as a clerical worker and at night I spend my spare time writing. Writing is my way of expressing my feelings about my world and life. Raised on a farm, I have a love for nature and am inspired by the beauty and power I find there. I've been married for 33 years and have three adult daughters. Some of my other interests include cooking, genealogy, reading and crocheting.  
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