Gnosis Diary: Life as a Heathen

My personal experiences, including religious and spiritual experiences, community interaction, general heathenry, and modern life on my heathen path, which is Asatru.

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Manifesting Wholehearted Wishes

This is a story about how I manifested something I truly desired. It's a model of how I manifest things, which you may or may not want to try. It's so simple it sounds like it's not even magic, but it's definitely magical.

Back in the 90s, I had bought myself a set of silverware. Yes, I know, lol, "the sort of person who buys their own silver" haha, not very classy, but I was moving into an apartment in Las Vegas and needed my own things. (I had the money to buy things and and move to Vegas to start a business because my dad had died.) So anyway-- my own things that were better than what I'd had in my college apartment, that is. Now, there was a time when it was assumed that a woman in her 20s starting her household would not need to buy major housewares because she would get them as wedding gifts. For those who still move into their first place when they get married, fine, "you do you" as the young people say these days, but that wasn't me lol. So anyway, I picked out a really beautiful pattern and I loved it and then a few years later, after I had gotten so sick with PCOS that I had had to close my bookstore and was unable to work, I ended up having to sell the silver. I got better eventually, and gradually put my life back together, and went on to have success at other things, but from time to time, I still missed my silver. Silly, I know. What with everything else, what's a few spoons? But I did miss it. For decades. Occasionally.

Long time readers of this blog may remember that my mom and I moved into this house together 20 years ago. Combining our households required dealing with duplicates of everything, especially kitchen stuff. No silver service, though. Mom had a few mismatched pieces but not enough to set actual place settings for the two of us. She didn't like silverware because it has to be washed by hand instead of in the dishwasher, so her fancy set was gold plate. That's fine, and I totally get wanting the convenience of using the dishwasher. A while after we moved here, gramma came to town when she gave up her own place and moved into assisted living, and we ended up with a lot of gramma's stuff too. Some really great old kitchen appliances that work better than the modern ones. No silver though.

Manifesting small items that either help me survive that the gods decide I needed even if I didn't think of it, like the story I told in the post Apport by the Roadside, or manifesting small things which are just things I want like the box of candles, which I told about on this blog in one of the posts about handling Tom's death, I forget which one, are experiences that have become more and more common in my life as I deepen by relationship with the gods and ancestors. I was not consciously trying to manifest a silver service, but I had been thinking about it again, missing my old one again.

I wished for a set of real silver silverware. It was a passing thought, but one that had recurred for so very long, it was definitely a true desire. I didn't do any spells. I didn't ask the gods for silver. I didn't ask the universe, at least not intentionally. I just wished.

A few days later I dug into a kitchen cabinet looking for my mortar and pestle. There was something heavy in the French bread basket. That was a basket my gramma had given me as a teenager, used to protect a doll in shipping. I had zero interest in a doll, but I definitely wanted a French bread basket, lol. So anyway, this basket is something I've had since I was in high school but it originally came from gramma. What's in there, that's so heavy?

Yep, you guessed it. A set of silverware. That I've never seen before. With a long-handled pie server in a shape I've never seen before.

I guess it was gramma's? The set was actually 2 similar sets that together made enough place settings for my table. Gramma's set bore obvious signs of some pieces having been run through a dishwasher at some point (white tarnish instead of black, which I rubbed off just as easily as the regular kind) and of being plate, not solid silver (the obvious sign being that it was worn away to copper in some places) which is fine; that means I'll never be tempted to sell it because it isn't worth anything.

Yeah, must have been gramma's. That's the explanation I gave myself when I wanted tea cups and found a box of them in the garage, if you'll recall that from an earlier post. Sure, must have been gramma's, that's a logical explanation. Or really not. How would I have not known that was in there if it had been in there since gramma moved to Nevada over a decade ago?

This is how manifesting works. For me, anyway. Things I want just appear. There is no spell casting, no intent meditation. The small joys that make me smile in the midst of otherwise very stressful times just come to me. The gods provide them, perhaps with help from ancestors and land spirits and whoever. These apports happen because I've tuned into the gods and the universe, which I did for its own sake, not because I was trying to learn to manifest things.

So, now I have spoons.

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Erin Lale is the author of Asatru For Beginners, and the updated, longer version of her book, Asatru: A Beginner's Guide to the Heathen Path. Erin has been a gythia since 1989. She was the editor and publisher of Berserkrgangr Magazine, and is admin/ owner of the Asatru Facebook Forum. She also writes science fiction and poetry, ran for public office, is a dyer and fiber artist, was acquisitions editor at a small press, and founded the Heathen Visibility Project.


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