Priestess Grove: Blossoming on the Spiral Path

A Priestess is a woman who acts as a conduit between the Heavenly and the Earthly realms, as our world shifts and turns and re-awakens it's ties to the Divine Feminine the role of the Priestess is once again coming out into the light of day. The Priestess Grove is a sanctuary of Priestess tools, ideas and inspiration to encourage the growth and re-emergence of Goddess consciousness back into the third dimensional world.

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Candise

Candise

Candise is an ordained Priestess of Grace who works with the Butterfly Spirit as her totem, and as a professional Psychic Channel.Candise practices a faith that she has named 'Feminine Mysticism'. In mysticism we acknowledge the One Source and recognize all else as human hypnotism. In Feminine spirituality we embrace duality and marry it, forming non-duality. It is through the practice of Feminine Mysticism that Candise utilizes ritual as a tool to see beyond the hypnotic suggestion of this realm.Priestess' have practiced the art of marrying the energies from this Earth realm and the Higher realms together for many moons now. Mystics endeavour to find Source behind the suggestions of illusion. Thus the Feminine Mystic approach to life is to marry the Truth of perfection with the human experience. This is the path that Candise Priestess', the Spiral Path of Grace, the path of the Feminine Mystic.
My services are offered both in person and via distance, one on one or in group settings, depending on what it is that you are in need of. You can find my services at : https://priestessofgrace.wordpress.com/2015/02/28/services/ To receive any of these services, or to ask any questions you can reach me at PofGrace@outlook.com
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly

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The Solar and Lunar Goddess and God

I've discussed in past articles my colourful first years on this earth. Childhood was painful and led to painful decisions in my teen years which resulted in some dangerous and unloving relationships with boys who were so far cut off from their spirit essence that it felt demonic being around them at times. 

 
With an authoritarian father figure and these early romantic liaisons as my blueprint for what a 'man' was I found dating to be extremely difficult when I entered my conscious path. I strived for mindfulness, love, compassion, kindness and forgiveness in my life, I also deeply desired to be loved by an other, a male counterpart to my female self. The men that were interested in me who were living in mindful spirit filled lives were not attractive to me in the least and the men that were attractive to me weren't drawn to me anymore. I was no longer a vibrational match for abusive criminal men and wasn't yet a vibrational match for the type of man that Goddess would intend for me. Thus I spent a lot of time alone and aching for a romantic partner. Eventually I found that there are men who either think they are walking an evolved path and are delusional or are pretending to and are wolves in sheep's clothing, these men were perfect matches for me during this stage of my spiritual evolution. We thought, or at least I think we both thought, that we were being mindful while we acted out the abuse pattern, him as abuser, most of the time, and me as victim, most of the time. 
 
The challenge, besides the obvious, is that I truly was continuing to grow along my spiritual path and my growth eventually vibed me out of these pseudo spiritual/abusive relationships. I became a Priestess, I dedicated myself to empowering myself and other women to connect to the Goddess within, the feminine face of Source and I could no longer turn a blind eye to my attraction to destructive, sadistic males. While this steered me out of the abuse pattern with men, it left me once again lost in the dating world and brought me to the place where I had to look at my addiction to the abuse pattern as well as my misperceived notions around what it meant to be masculine.
 
I fell in love with the writings of David Deida, he explains that there are three levels of masculine and feminine essences. I was attracted to first level masculine (though not all first level masculine men are abusive) and was myself surrounded by a lot of men who were in their second stage masculine, I began to desire the third level masculine as a love experience. (This article is not about David Deida, so this paragraph is grossly simplifying his works, I highly suggest anyone to go out and purchase one of his books and cd's to get a full emersion into his work.) In short, the first level masculine is the old fashioned chauvinistic man of the 1950's who expects to be weighted on and cared for, the second level masculine is exploring his feminine essence and leads with his feminine, there were a lot of men who were very much primarily in what I at the time called their feminine essence in the circles I was frequenting. The third level masculine leads with his masculine self but is very much in touch with and able to access his feminine. The reverse of these three states is true for the feminine. Generally speaking men are primarily masculine and women are primarily feminine in the David Deida model. The third level masculine became my hope, a loving version of the strong, directive force that I sought out in abusive relationships. 
 
When I met my husband in New York he was a glorious example of somebody who led with his masculine self and was able to access his feminine through his song writing, acting and ability to empathize, cry and hold me. I was finally in love and I was finally attracted to a healthy strong man. I couldn't have been happier.
 
I hadn't done all of my work on my personal attraction to the abuse pattern before meeting my husband and while it seemed as though I was going to be able to skip over it one day I came face to face with the original essence of all that had attracted me to the abuse pattern and began a one year decent into deep trauma work. During this year I was confused and hurt, I mistook abuse for masculine essence and would pressure my then boyfriend (soon to be finance and then husband) to be more masculine. He would express his feelings, or be patient with me, or cook for me and I would take these loving gestures and explode that he was 'too feminine'. One day he sat me down and asked for me to clearly explain to him what I wanted, to let him know what it was that seemed to be lacking in the 'masculine' essence I wanted in our relationship. I can't remember what it is that I said, I just remember blurting it all out and watching him as he took it in, finally as I was finishing I saw his brow furrow and he shook his head sadly and responded, "Candise, I can't do that, it sounds like you're asking me to abuse you." That struck a note with me, even though I felt justified in my insanely insensitive behaviour I knew that he was right.
 
Thanks to deep trauma therapy, I came out the other side of that nightmarish year, I was my 'old' self again, only cleared of a lot of unconscious programming. My husband and I mended our relationship, we grew closer and rebuilt trust. However there were residual harms and the term 'masculine' and 'feminine' became triggering within our relationship.
 
Outside of our relationship I began to notice other area's where using the terms masculine and feminine to describe traits or behaviours wasn't working anymore. I would share with my women friends about struggles that they were going through and when I would name parts of their behaviour or tendencies as masculine they would become quiet and withdrawn. This wasn't inspiring for either of us, the word itself is in fact an adjective for being manly and regardless of how strong or efficient my girlfriend was she didn't want to be told that her strength was a part of her manly self. When I would attempt to praise the strong feminine that my husband did possess past wounds of being called feminine as though it made him womanly were present. I don't know that many men will find being told that their sensitive selves are a part of them that is womanly. 
 
These discussions began to expand my awareness, we qualify objects as masculine and feminine, the sun is masculine, the moon is feminine, fire is masculine, water is feminine and we attribute these states as being more active, direct and extroverted or more passive, flowing or introverted, insinuating that energy that is associated with males is active, direct and extroverted and that energy associated with females is passive, flowing and introverted. From this perspective a man can't be masculine and flowing and a woman can't be feminine and extending, the man has a feminine side that is flowing and the woman has a masculine side that is extending. While the attempt to encompass a wholeness within each one of us by finding both sexes within us may have been the impetus for naming these qualities as either masculine or feminine, they have instead defined what masculine and feminine can be and have contributed to an unconscious form of sexism. I was left with the question, where do I go from here?
 
A few years later and people in my Priestess circle began to discuss the Solar Feminine, they made reference to the many Solar Goddesses that were revered prior to the patriarchy as well as the Lunar Gods that were well known. I liked the idea of a Solar Goddess but didn't know how to reconcile this with the sun being attributed as a masculine essence until it finally dawned on me, I was done with the terms masculine and feminine altogether and I was adopting the terms solar and lunar. 
 
I like to be in my lunar essence, I feel most at peace in my lunar essence, however I often gravitate towards my solar essence as I have very strong and efficient solar abilities that were instilled in me when living under a very solar father as a child. When I do call upon or unconsciously go into my solar self my husband's lunar self is called up in response to my solar essence as an energetic adjustment to create and maintain polarity between us. Polarity is where the spice is, the fire and the passion and most romantic relationships are seeking to remain in an energetic polarity to keep that attraction alive. 
 
When I began to frame our essence as lunar and solar rather than feminine and masculine  I began to own my  wild, passionate fiery Goddess self and to honour the cool, receptive, magical God beside me when I was having a solar day and he was having a lunar day. If I feel like I want my husband to bring the light and the direction of the solar then I call on my lunar essence, the one that I prefer to be in and watch as he burns bright in his solar. Some days we might both be solar and some days we might both be lunar, though I find more polarity and passion when we are two halves of the one whole and so one of us usually switches our essence when we arrive home after being out in the world if we discover that we are matching the others frequency. 
 
Now when I talk with my girlfriends and reference her solar energy rather than calling it her 'masculine' energy she feels empowered and as though she is calling upon a sacred force, rather than being manly in some shape or form because she is choosing to extend or exert herself.
 
Naming solar qualities as masculine disempowers our feminine, it tells us that we can have solar qualities  as a counterpart to our feminine selves but that those qualities are 'masculine' and therefore connected to man and not to ourselves.
 
I do like the terms feminine and masculine, I am grateful that the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine are on the rise. I also embrace the Solar Feminine and the Lunar Feminine as well as the Lunar Masculine and the Solar Masculine. I believe that solar and lunar are ways to empower the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine. Below are a list of Solar Goddesses and Lunar God's that were once a common part of every day life, let us remember what wholeness lay beyond qualifying one essence as feminine and one as masculine: 
 
Aditi: is an Indian Goddess of light. She is an expression of the Divine Feminine as illumination, a Creatrix that carries the spark of life and gives birth to all that is.
 
Arma: is a Hittite and Luwian Moon God, his connection to the Moon gave Him the powers of a magician. The moon is a mirror and lends great energy to the magician archetype.
 
Amaterasu: is a Japenese Shinto Goddess of the Sun and the Heavenly realms. In Japenese myth She is the Sun Goddess and Her brother Tsukiyomi is a Moon God, in some stories it is Amaterasu's anger at Her brother for assaulting another Goddess that made Her vow to never see Her brother again and explained why the Sun and the Moon were never seen together. This is a wariorress stance, one that banishes and claims loudly that violence against women is not acceptable, Her power drives Him away and She shines brightly, free of Her brother and proud in Her position as the head of Japan's pantheon. You can see her symbol on the Japanese flag.
 
Nanna: is a Mesopotamian Moon God whose symbol is a bull, the crescent shape of the bull horns symbolize the Moon. This God was associated with fertility, the bull is a fertile and strong masculine totem. He was sought out in aid of divination, His connection to the Moon gave him powers of illumination in the psychic realm.
 
Baast: is a powerful Egyptian Sun Goddess with the head of a Lioness, she represents playfulness, magic, fertility and magical radiance. She is a fierce protectress.
 
Toth: is an Egyptian Moon God who aided Isis, Osiris and Nut, he has powerful magic and is connected to the power of the written word. The inspiration that the Moon stirs up gave him the power of the word and of magic.
 
The above Goddesses and Gods are but a few that reverse the roles that have become associated with female and male roles, even when shrouded under the term feminine and masculine. I challenge myself to begin to utilize the terms feminine and masculine as representations of the fully expressed feminine energy of Goddess and the fully expressed masculine energy of God. These have become terms that encompass all traits, solar and lunar, for me. In embracing both my solar and my lunar self I release any judgement that I and society have unconsciously bestowed upon my solar self. I don't have a 'strong' masculine that I choose to quiet when I am with my husband in order that I might wear my feminine. I have a strong bright solar light that serves me well when I am in my work and navigating the external active world. I also have a mystically magical lunar self that I love to revel in when I have somebody shining their strong solar beam in relation to me.
 
If I feel it, think it, express it or be it then it is feminine because I am feminine. If you feel it, think it, express it or be it and you are a woman it is feminine, even if your expression of feminine differs from mine or the social construct of feminine. If you as a man feel it, express it or be it then it is masculine because you are masculine exactly as you choose to show up. This is my freedom. This is my sovereignty. This is my truth.
 
When I think back to David Deida's work I believe the first level masculine and feminine are men and women that exude only solar or lunar traits. In the second level the men try on their lunar and forfeit the solar and the women try on their solar and forfeit their lunar, however in the third level both woman and man stand side by side as Priestess and Priest, conduits for both lunar and solar energy, able at will to call upon whichever energy will best suit the situation at hand.
 
 
As we continue to raise up the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine and allow them to  encompass both lunar and solar qualities we begin to reclaim our wholeness, our ability to be a reflection of the all, we connect to our Priestess or Priest self and become empowered shining, magical beings. I pray for bright Solar Goddesses and magical Lunar Gods as well as intuitive Lunar Goddesses and powerful Solar Gods to live through each and every one of us, I pray that my daughter will live in a world where the only 'feminine' aspect that she defines herself by is that which is her radiant Goddess self. And I vow to honour the lunar and solar in each and every being that I encounter regardless of their sex, this is how I invite and accept the allness of the Great Goddess within me.
 
Lastly I forgive myself and I forgive those that were conditioned to condition me to believe that my solar aspects were anything less than desirable or feminine qualities and I ask forgiveness of every strong and whole man that I mistook as being less than strong and capable in the face of their lunar self. May this forgiveness extend in a ripple and be a drop in the ocean of reconciliation and restoration of the Goddess and God expressions of Source on Earth.
 
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly
 
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Recent Comments - Show all comments
  • Candise
    Candise says #
    Thank you Michele. I am so glad that there are other women and men that are finding these terms as confining as I have found them
  • Michele Murphy
    Michele Murphy says #
    I love this so much. For me the terms masculine and feminine are fraught with society's belief that feminine is lesser and weak. I

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The Spring Equinox Resurrection

The Spring Equinox is one of the four major cross quarters of the year. There are two Equinoxes and two Solstices and for people that follow the wheel of the year these four major cross quarters are often celebrated in a group or solitary ceremony.

 
As a Priestess I have led many Equinox and Solstice ceremonies.I get lit up leading a group of women and men as we tap into the energies of the quarter we are celebrating, adding ritual tunes us into the cycle that we are entering and also gives us an opportunity to set intention for the upcoming cycle. We get to build on the cycle of the wheel, to flow with the rhythm of Mother Gaia and to be a part of the shifting cosmo's.
 
In short we are born anew on the Spring Equinox, we come together and merge, tapping into the ripe fullness of spring and the fertile times around us as we celebrate the earth and Her sensuous gifts on Beltaine, when the Summer Solstice comes around we give thanks for all that is manifest, we call upon the Light and shine it upon our life, illuminating and bringing into awareness what is, at Lammas we prepare for our harvest, we begin to take stock of what we have grown over the summer months, by the time the Autumn Equinox rolls around we begin to harvest, we gather what we wish to keep and to bring with us into the dark hibernating months ahead and we perish that which no longer serves, Samhain is a dark night of ritual where the dead is honoured, the veils are lifted and we go deep into the unknown, Winter Solstice we awaken from our deep slumber, take a break momentarily from hibernation and celebrate the coming light, Imbolc begins to quicken us awake as we go over the deep transformations that have taken place over the Winter months in our cave of hibernation and we prepare to be reborn into the Spring Equinox, and thus the wheel begins again.
 
These are the cycles that I celebrate and when the wheel rolls around to the Spring Equinox I gather those who are called and hold ceremony. Some years there are many of us that gather, some years it is my Beloved and I that gather together, just the two of us in a private ceremony and other years I honour in a solo way. 
 
Of all of the phases of the wheel, this one is the toughest for me personally. Unlike so many others that struggle with the darker phases of the year, it is the returning of the light that has been a challenge for me, long before I was a Priestess, long before I had heard about the wheel of the year I struggled with the coming of spring. Once I began my path I would contemplate the visceral reaction that I had to the changing weather, my stomach in knots of anxiety, a sense of dread hovering around me and a desire to escape the world and stay in bed. It didn't make sense to my rational mind, this is the season everybody celebrates, the cold is gone, the sun is out, it's time to celebrate! Well for me it isn't. 
 
Eventually I did come to a conclusion about my aversion to the Spring Equinox and the season it ushers in. The conclusion that I have come to is twofold. The first is that the springtime ushers in with her the inevitable summer, the long days and heady nights begin in the springtime, this change of weather triggered a response within me, a post traumatic response to a date rape that had happened when I was a teenager on a thick and balmy summer night. I didn't connect this occurrence with the spring, as it happened in the summer, however it is the shift into spring that first brings me back into the summer weather and that sense of the season would trigger me every year, and every year that I was triggered and didn't know the cause the trigger would just become deeper and more painful. Blessedly I entered trauma therapy and while I don't know that the wounds of rape ever vanish, the scar of that occurrence has sealed over and the wound has closed for the most part. This means that the warm air that begins to waft and the bright skies that begin to shine don't have the same affect on me as they once did. As I began to process and release the trauma that was trapped in my body I found that each passing spring was a new experience of more and more ease. I began to get excited some years at the beauty of spring, the warmth, the birds, and most exciting of all was that I began to remember a time when I didn't dread the springtime, a time long before date rapes and chaotic teenage angst when as a child I had really been as happy with the spring as everyone else around me. This healing and releasing of trauma has relieved so much of the wind of panic that would come up for me that I began to think that perhaps I wouldn't have a struggle with the Spring Equinox at all anymore.
 
Until the past few days, when the second part of my challenge with this time of year was revealed. The Spring Equinox is the time of the Maiden Goddess Archetype, it was no mystery to me or anyone else that worked with me as I developed in my Prietessing ministry that the Maiden aspect of the Goddess and myself held great wells of sorrow for me. It was when I was in my Maiden that I received all of my abuse, not only at the hands of my rapist but also from the men that were guiding me as I grew, the boys that I misguidedly chose to date as a teen and also from myself. These Maiden years were dark ones of despair for me, however I attributed the pain in my Maiden years to the first reason why the spring was so challenging and found that the pain and wounds of all abuse was released during my healing work thus nullifying the painful memories of being a Maiden as a reason for my springtime resistance. However, to my utter shock and disbelief, once the trauma had been felt and lifted out of the body that had stored it I began to have visceral memories about enjoying my Maiden self, I began to remember aspects of my childhood that I missed greatly. My teenage years, the ones that became so chaotically dangerous suddenly contained within them such precious memories, such deep moments of connection, sisterly bondedness, wistful dreaming and true idealism that I became profoundly appreciative of years that I for a very long time preferred to think about as little as possible and attempted to bury completely.
 
I am so grateful to the Goddess for clearing away the trauma and revealing to me the beauty and splendour of my Maiden years, the spaces within me that were untouchable by others and even by my own self destructive tendencies, and for recovering memories of a beautiful time in my life for me.
 
The second challenge to the Spring Equinox for me is not in facing the wounded part of the Maiden Archetype within me, it is the depth of grief that I have as I feel the Maiden aspect of myself drift further and further away from me as the years pass. I feel her like I would feel a ghost. I feel her longing for freedom and self expression and revolution. I feel her wistfulness, I feel her wonder at life and her belief despite all of the contrary evidence that at the core of everyone is the Divine. I feel her unbelievable, indescribable bond with her best friend, one dark haired, one light haired, both confused for one another because they are so fused, I remember finishing sentences, laying on each others laps, spending every spare moment together, watching t.v. shows on the phone together, I remember this love that is so intense and so passionate and so unromantic but as strong as any romance that I have had and I feel the hours and the hours that were hers to do with as she wished. I feel her and she is so much further away then she was last year, she is so much further away then she was before I gave birth, before I was married, before I fell in love, before I moved out west, before I dropped out of school, before I moved out of my house. Somehow the wheel keeps on turning and she continues to fall further and further away from me and what I once celebrated, the death of her memory I now grieve so deeply that each new springtime bud reminds me of a time when all I had was time, time to be unto myself and to wonder at what life would be. 
 
This Spring Equinox is a resurrection of all things Maiden for me. The Spring Equinox, is a time of rebirth and my work as a Priestess is to allow the energy of the wheel of the year and the medicine that it holds to mould me and to guide me, and so, this year as I prepare for ceremony I prepare to rebirth my Maiden self. Though I am walking in my Mother years I still have access to that Maiden self, each waxing moon honours the Maiden within me and each Spring that is sprung is a season to pull her up from the recesses of my unconscious, Persephone returning from Hades, my Maiden self is returning from the hellish memories that once lived with sweet, tender, life filled ones. It is my job to keep that energy, the energy of idealism, faith, hope, revolution, love, sisterly bonds and deep healing alive within myself. These are the parts of myself that ignite the flames of passion within, the springtime is the season for the fire element with the wheel that I honour and my inner Maiden lights those flames.
 
In humble reverence to the mysteries that are revealed within each cycle of the wheel as it spins by I step out into this cycle and walk through the fires of challenge that the Maiden Archetype has held for me for so many years and I resurrect her essence within. If each one of us could hold the essence of our Maiden and Lad selves within us, could honour them for one cycle of the year each year, then we would have a generation of wizened Mothers, Fathers, Enchantresses, Wizards, Grandmothers and Grandfathers radiating from within them all that is enviable about youth balanced with the nurturance, magic and wisdom of the other stages of life that we walk in. 
 
That is my vision for the whole tomorrow as I go into ceremony, I hold the Maiden Goddess Archetype up within myself and within each person that I find, remembering that we are all, at the core of us, Divine children of the One Mother Goddess. I honour the innocence in me that is alive and pulsating and I honour the innocence that is within my sisters and brothers, I commit to seeing past the stories, the wounds, the conditioning and to finding the spark that lives within each one of us that is ever ignited. I go within and I sit with my own inner spark and give thanks and praise to the Maiden that lives within me for shining her light throughout all of the dark and all of the joy. Blessed Be.
 
Happy Spring Equinox.
 
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly
 
 
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Men who honour the Goddess

 

During this month of Light returning (Imbolc) and love igniting (Valentine's celebrations) I collaborated with a man who worships and praises the Divine Feminine expression of the one Source. 
 
The re-emergence of the Goddess has challenged everybody to question the patriarchal realm that has been dominating us for too long. With the rise of the Goddess comes a new relationship with the Divine, as well as Father God that we connect to in the Heavenly realms we have begun to become reacquainted with the Mother Goddess of the Earthly world that we are in.
 
Although it has seemed as though it is women who predominantly worship and honour the Goddess, she is not a 'God' for women. Just as the patriarchy  harms both women and men, the Goddess is an expression of Source that feeds both women and men.
 
Once I began to know the Feminine aspects of the Creator, She became such a significant part of my life that I couldn't imagine having a long term relationship with a man that couldn't honour that side of Source. I also couldn't imagine raising children who didn't know Her face and presence. I didn't believe that I could be led to a strong, masculine man who would honour Goddess, nor one that would join me in raising Goddess conscious children. The man I was dating when I began my Priestess path would vehemently argue "why does it have to be so much about She and Her? God isn't a woman you know." I would counter, "I know, God also isn't a man, so why not use Her for a few hundred years since we've all gotten to know the Him side so well?" I could feel him bristle, he felt threatened and upset and there was nothing I could do. Shortly thereafter we parted ways.
 
My employer at the time was only too happy to set me up on a blind date with a wealthy, successful man who was ready to settle down and have children. I was happy to go on a date, my last relationship had gotten quite tedious, and I was looking to have children in the nearish future. When I met up with this man I didn't feel the spark, but I decided to explore it. He showed interest in my spirituality, the Goddess Gatherings I attended and the Priestess training I was doing.  A part of me felt vulnerable about revealing my sacred inner world to a person I had just met, but his enthusiasm made me ignore my reservations. After we parted ways I pondered how I would politely decline a future date, as I knew he wasn't for me. I also pondered how I would let my employer know that her blind date hadn't created a future marriage. I arrived at work and my boss pulled me aside.
 
"Candise, Peter (let's call him Peter) said that you seemed more into the Goddess than you were into having a family."
 
I'm going to pause here a moment to share that I wish I could have put a halt to this insulting conversation then and there, but I was shocked, humiliated and dumbfounded.
 
In a condescending voice my employer went on to suggest that I ease people into my lifestyle and not mention it on a first date. That night on the bus ride home I cried, devastated that I had shared about my sacred journey with this man. I felt humiliated to be discussed as though I were a piece of property and then shamed for who I am. I was desolate, certain that that I would never find a man who would honour my path, let alone join me on it.
 
Fast forward two months later and I was flying to New York, a whirlwind of a city where I met and instantly fell in love with my husband. As we sat at a busy diner the night we met he asked me similar questions to the blind date guy, except this time I felt at home and safe. I felt as though all of my life was being coated in pink gossamer. I just fell into a conversation about who and what I was, and he was enraptured. He compared me to his psychic mother and genuinely admired my work. Months later as we dated and then moved in together he would play guitar and lead "We all come from the Goddess..." in circles that I led. He would drop me off at Priestess circles and Goddess Gatherings and join me for events where men were welcomed. 

 

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Mercury Retrograding with a Toddler
Here we are, in the midst of another Mercury Retrograde. 
 
Being a Priestess of Grace my daily aim is to follow the path of Grace, not only do I follow where Grace leads I allow Her presence to infuse my life. When Grace is invited in karma is dissolved and 'worldly' powers have no effect on us, the caveat here is that we need to be aligned so deep in the Grace that it overcomes our conditioning or the strength of the pulls of this realm. I know at my truest core, that in the face of the One Divine One Mercury Retrograde has no power.
 
However.....
 
I'm pretty human and I feel Lady Mercury and her coyote spirit so strongly every time! I purposefully do not look up retrogrades in an attempt to further deepen my fall into Grace, the idea being that "thoughts held in mind produce in their own kind," and not knowing will keep me aligned with Grace and out of the effects of the retrograde, that little trick has not worked as of yet as I still find myself at a loss for words, riled up, impatient and frustrated that what I'm trying to say is not coming out clearly during each Mercury Retrograde that rolls around. Sure enough I check my Moon calendar and there we are in  the midst of another Mercury Retrograde.
 
The beauty of Feminine Mysticism, is that it acknowledges the One Power while also finding the Divine in the human realm and all of the tides, cycles and rhythms that occur to us while embodied. I have found that the gift within the Mercury Retrogrades that I experience is in the pause, the pausing to think a little bit harder before I speak, to contemplate a little more mindfully before I act and to breathe a little bit deeper when it takes me 30 minutes to register for a new Wordpresss site, still breathhhhiiiinnngg over that one.
 
This particular retrograde that we are in has been tempting me to get pretty prickly, besides my general Mercury Retrograde struggle to push at keeping life moving smoothly and at a pace that is comfortable for me while stumbling over words (something pretty foreign to this write-a-holic) I found myself at a loss for patience and perseverance in my gentle approach with my toddler Maiden who happens to be going through a developmental leap and teething at the same time that Mercury is retrograde...coincidence? I think not.
 
Being a Priestess is magical, it is inspiring, uplifting, magnificent. It is also earthy, human and common. A Priestess is the bridge between both the Otherworld and the here and now, and in my here and now Mothering a one and a half year old Maiden takes up a good chunk of my practice.
 
The first 48 hours of this retrograde her and I butted heads, I snapped, which is unusual towards her, I was edgy, impatient and temperamental, she just pushed harder, experimenting with hitting, screeching, demanding 'milk, milk, milk' which means breasts out, sitting down and taking a break to breast feed her while I seethed inside trying to rush the process so that I could get back to what I needed to be doing.
 
By the end of the 48 hours, after a snotty nosed melt down and a nap on Mom I was spent, I knew that I was veering way off my Mother Goddess mark and I took some time to re-evaluate. Not only was I going through another Mercury Retrograde, my sweet little, still-incarnating soul of a daughter was too. I began to empathise with her, still learning how to communicate in this realm, no longer able to desire and instantly manifest like in the one that she has just left behind, trying to learn our language, our societal norms, how to navigate the spectrum of emotions and moods that course through her and me and her father and the world at large and then boom, this cosmic halt on all things smooth insofar as communication goes comes waltzing into our lives. I looked down at her tear stained sleeping face and just felt the weight of this world on her little shoulders, and I just wanted to wrap her up and hold her close, forever, or at least until this retrograde is finished.
 
This is where my Motherhood began to feed my Priestess path this month. For years now, I have navigated how to flow through retrogrades with as much ease as possible, this month it became about navigating myself and another, as within so without was never so true until my daughter arrived.
 
What I began to do was to use less words, always a plus with toddlers, but an exaggerated amount less, I sang more, I hugged more, I counted slowly 1....2.....3.....ahhhh haaaa over and over again, I danced, I coloured, I came into myself and relied less on the spoken word and more on the language of the heart. My daughter and I have thrived since this shift, our bond is supernatural again, when we struggle to express ourselves we pause, we hug (she initiates sometimes even!) and we slow down. Our 20 minute walk to the store the other day took us an hour and we had never been so happy.
 
When I began my journey of the Priestesshood I was inspired by the magic I was beginning to conjure, the inspiration and the connection to the cosmos, I tried to brush off the number of sages, teachers, books and confidantes who had told me that in order to be in the state I was seeking I needed to become willing to be fully human. And then I became a Mother and found that life has never been so ripe with magic as coming fully down into it. I found in my Priestesshood the sacred centre of Gaia and Heaven and in that centre I have discovered that Heaven speaks to me through my life on Gaia. Since my transition into Motherhood my Maiden has reflected back to me the spaces that I have lagged in my spiritual practice, she is the Divine reflection of what was justified away coming up to be addressed. Being spicy isn't an excuse for impatience when there is a little Lamb looking up at me with watery sapphire eyes ready to emulate my response to life disappointing me in the moments that I am tempted to loose my temper. Flying off the handle and yelling at my Beloved because I'm a wild feminine Oceanic expression of the Goddess doesn't cut it when my daughter's whole concept of God is my sweet husband for now, may she never believe that the Goddess should destroy the God because of her femininity. And ignoring my need to be where I'm at, sensitive to Mercury Retrograde, and push ahead bullheaded and insistent that I be heard as I forcefully try to explain myself 'one more time', doesn't cut it when my little girl begins hitting and screeching because she isn't being heard and to because to be honest life is like one big Mercury Retrograde for her at this age.
 
I bow down to my life on Gaia and give reverent thanks for the lessons I am afforded. I shudder in embarrassment at the arrogant insistence I had that life be more magical, less earthy, and more deep than other people's in order for me to justify my existence on it. And I breathe as I reflect during this retrograde, finally stopping to follow the lead of this spiral path and learning from the moment that we are in.
 
I look forward to guiding my daughter as she ages, teaching her about astrology, the occult, retrogrades, moon phases, red tents, all of the juicy aspects of life that have lit me up. I'm also prepared to learn how to play basketball, study biology, listen to her fascination in mathematics, or any other number of interests she may decide are inspiring to her, despite how lost I feel in those subjects. Her emerging self will reveal to me how to best Mother her as she grows. But for now, until she tells me otherwise, she has a Priestess as a Mother and I will follow my path to support and love her in the best way that I can, and today that means slowing down, getting quiet, reflecting and listening deeper while closing my mouth.
 
I will listen to Mercury Retrograde, I will listen to the reflections that my loved ones shine upon me and I will listen to my gut, my inner wombspace of wisdom and I will allow myself to grow and to learn in the uncomfortable spaces. As I learn to do this for myself and to support my daughter in being held through her first experiences with frustration and impatience I become better equipped to take my Mother presence, the space within me that expresses the Mother Goddess, into the world to nurture, hold space and unconditionally love all of the children, both small and grown, as we flow to the best of our ability along the spiral path of the Goddess.
 
Blessed Be Mercury Retrograde and all my relations.
 
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly
 
 
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Receiving my Wings

When a Native Canadian man once told me that my animal totem was the butterfly I was initially disappointed. Being short in stature already and having a tiny frame I thought that he was mistaken. He must not have fully connected to spirit and his medicine and was subconsciously  associating teeny me with the teeny butterfly. I knew that inside was ferocity, passion, fearlessness, I was certain I was a cat, a tiger, a spider, something feminine, dark, mysterious and sexy. When I was given my Native name : Little Soaring Butterfly, I decided it was time to get to know my totem and to open up to the idea that perhaps this medicine man had seen something that I had missed.

 
In my study of the butterfly there were a few things that I resonated with from the beginning, one was the constant transformation that those who have or work with the butterfly totem experience in their lives. Being a Scorpio who is constantly digging, unearthing, discarding and rebuilding, my life has felt like a continuous construction site undergoing transformation after transformation. Another aspect that I resonated with was the blessings that the butterfly totem leaves behind her as she moves, with each flutter of her wings the butterfly sheds iridescent scales, leaving a path of light wherever she goes. This concept inspired me and was in alignment with the path of Grace that I follow, the idea that I need not do anything but rather that I can be the presence of spirit and bless the world that I encounter provided I remain in alignment with the Goddess within was one that I endeavoured to live up to already, the visual of leaving scales of light behind drew the butterfly spirit deep into my very own heart. When I learnt that a beautiful butterfly is poisonous to the predators that catch and eat it I knew that I had indeed received the correct totem. A tiny, cute, transformative being that sheds light but is deadly if attacked, I could get on board with that.
 
The transformations that have occurred throughout my life have been of varying degrees with varying affects on my life, intensive eye surgeries as a child created massive transformation in my resilience and maturation process. Loosing jobs and having newer and better opportunities show up at just the moment I needed it have strengthened my faith in Grace. From getting sober to breaking up with my boyfriend, varying degrees, varying results, constant shifts and transformative growth have been a mainstay of my life.
 
The butterfly totem had been showing up in my life as transformative experiences and opportunities to grow and to evolve, however the butterfly herself is a completely transformed being, she doesn't just go through an ordeal as a caterpillar and become a stronger or wiser caterpillar, she actually becomes a completely different being. I hadn't had that experience, I had had some close experiences where it seemed as though who I was was morphed and about to become a new being, yet in actuality I was becoming a more whole and integrated aspect of myself. I didn't desire to become a new being because on this journey I had learnt to love myself exactly as I was. I expected that I would continue on through my life having different transformative experiences and expanding and growing because of them and was content to except that as the way of life.
 
The butterfly totem it seems had a different plan in mind for me and I was destined to not only receive her medicine through life experiences, I was called to leave behind my life as a caterpillar and to emerge as a new being. Much to my surprise it was in becoming a Mother that my total transformation occurred, I went from being a Maiden caterpillar and emerged as a Mother butterfly. When I was pregnant I didn't know that I was in my cocoon and I had no idea that becoming a Mother would be the event that morphed me into a new being. Before this transformation occurred  if I had contemplated an event that could bring me into this all encompassing rebirth I would have guessed at many more deep or seemingly spiritual events that would have done it. I would have thought that it would be one of my many meditations, a moment in a 12 step meeting, during a Goddess circle that I was leading or on a solstice or a miraculous event that spontaneously dawned upon me while out in nature, I probably would have guessed anything besides becoming a Mom. Doing what millions of women do every day and giving birth to a baby would not have been the spectacular event that this Priestess would envision as her moment of becoming and yet here I sit in a new state and as a new being 15 months later.
 
I hadn't recognized the total transmutation into another being that I had become at first, I was mired down in diapers, breast milk and indescribable awe and intense hormones. In fact it wasn't until I returned to my hometown and my parents house that I knew, not only had my daughter been born anew, I too was a new being. 
 
My hometown is a tiny, sleepy city that was wrought with bad memories, dense energy and family systems that seemed so toxic I was certain I would stay away forever, never did I imagine that I would ever be present for very long with my precious Maiden. 
 
As I walked through my hometown the spots that held memories of deep pain and shame and a reality that today is like a distant nightmare were simple plots of land, free from any energetic ties that once held me. I walked a free woman any place in the city. At home when family members behaved in ways that hooked me in the past I found myself responding as any outsider would, with interest a bit of mirth and walking away when the dynamics began to feel tense. I wasn't tied to how they acted anymore, I didn't internalize it as a part of me or as being caused by me.
 
I am free. I see my family as beautifully human and real people, they are no longer demons that have cut me and damaged a part of me irrevocably, they are raw and real and forgiven. I watch my daughter fall in love with them, she senses their blood and is at home in her tribe when she is around them. I watch as they carefully apply principles that they know we uphold in our home, so nervous that one wrong move will take me and baby packing, across the country, far from home, where I've been for the past 10 years now. I love them and I honour them and I stay with them when they are human, I no longer punish them for their past as I have been freed from mine and pray that I never hold another person in bondage to theirs.
 
I in no way believe that having a baby just busted open the doors to freedom, gave me butterfly wings and erased all of the pain from my past. I know that the intensive work that the path that I have walked has laid the foundation for the opportunity to fly, I just had no idea that Motherhood would be the catalyst to receiving my butterfly wings.
 
As a Priestess the cycles that we dance through as a woman moves me deeply, I am a firm believer that a woman needs not ever birth a child in order to move into the Mother stage of her life. I chose with the magic of the Goddess and the commitment of my Beloved to become a Mother, for me childbirth was the door to the Mother phase of my life. However I've always been connected to my Mother self, even as a young Maiden I was called to care for and to nurture, my artist births babies through my creations, I have been Mothering my entire life. The switch into Mother as the primary role came with the birth of my daughter. If it is not childbirth that is your doorway to entering the Mother stage of life it will be something that moves you deeply, opens your heart wide open and lights your life up in ways that you have never seen before. When you enter your Mother stage of life you will be compelled to nurture, extend, care for and Mother all. This may not be your transformative moment though, it was mine but each of us have a unique blueprint to our soul's walk along this spiral path of the Earth~bound experience.
 
As the majority of the Western world celebrates the coming in of a new year and releases the old I encourage us all to walk towards transforming who we are into new beings, free beings, beings that are released from the bondage of who it is that we were taught to be. 
 
I encourage those of us walking a conscious path to explore the animal totems and to find the one that resonates with who you are, to take stock of your life up until this point, honouring the dark nights of the soul, revelling in the bright lightness of the highs that you have sailed upon and being open to the revelation of what your next step is to be. As we all transform and are released we raise the vibration that is being held on Mother Gaia, we make the way lighter and easier for all of those in this reality. Many, many souls are being called to leave this realm and many souls are re~entering again, let us raise the potential for global transformation to occur through our own personal work and surrendered walking into 2015.
 
I don't know what your transforming moment will be. In hindsight I am not surprised that becoming a Mother was mine, it was the moment that I began to be an expanded self, I was no longer an extension of my ancestry, I became a link in a chain that extended beyond myself and this has caused me to be more giving and altruistic than I ever could have been based upon morals and values alone. As I tend the life that came through me, that will continue on after me, that carries the blood line of my Grandmothers and myself I begin to serve in a microcosmic way the way that I am called to be to the entire macrocosm. For me it truly does begin at home and my personal goal is to go out into the macrocosm treating each being as if they are the child that I have birthed, for beneath it all we are all innocent children walking the most integral path that we can in this given moment. I endeavour to be the Mother Goddess to her children upon this Earth and give eternal thanks to my daughters soul, she chose me to birth her and has given me my wings. 
 
I will soar into the next year and hope to have many sisters and brothers by my side.
 
Many blessings from a fairly new Butterfly to you and yours.
 
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly.
 
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Moon Medicine

 

I have been returning my Moon blood to the Earth for years now. This practice began as an intuitive one that was followed by learning about the cycles of the Moon and my body. Just before I began to collect my Moon blood I had been drawn to cloth Moon pads and suddenly collecting my blood and offering it back to the Earth seemed the only reasonable place to put my blood.
 
My Priestess that mentored me, Aquarius, taught me that when creating ceremony it was often beneficial to first do the research that was needed into the subject being ritualized and then to let the intellect go and to follow the intuition, in the instance with my blood it went the other way around. I first followed my gut and then, began to research the practice of returning my blood to the Earth and the significance that it carried.
 
With the combination of listening to my gut and agreeing with what I had learnt intellectually about the sacredness of one's blood, the shame of throwing our life force into the garbage and the power in giving thanks for our ability to create life on all levels by giving our lifeblood back to the body of the Earth that gives us life, I felt pretty complete in my decision. It was in alignment with my Priestess self and that was a sound way to be. What I didn't get however was the felt sense of sacredness, connection and the deep experience that I knew was connected to my revered action, yet I held hope that one day I would, that one day it would 'click' and I would feel the profound depth of my action.
 
That day came just a few weeks ago. As I blundered through my final days leading up to my Moon time, spiritually wandering and seeking I began to bleed. I sought out my Moon blood jar and for the first time, in a very long time, became  completely present. I was present as I washed the blood from my Moon pad into the jar, I was present as I walked to the door, the walk was a procession, a sacred walk and I was aware that the vessel that I carried outside of me, in my hands had become an external womb containing my essence and the seeds of potential life within it. I have a specific place of land that I offer my blood to and this time I slowed down, I felt overwhelmed with gratitude at the opportunity that I had to not only receive the life force into me over the past moon cycle, but also for the chance to release and to let go of all that no longer served me as I bled. I felt reverence as I offered my seeds, my essence and all that I was letting go of into Mother Earth, a profound sense of relief that She can carry for me what I no longer can, that She receives it all and returns it to the life of Her very own body. I was connected to the Goddess, I was out of my head, the intellectual business of trying to conceptualize and wonder about a Goddess much too mysterious to be contained within my tiny brain was lifted and I was, once again a conscious part of Her, I was Her daughter, Her Priestess, Her devotee.
 
This past Moon time the presence, the grounding, the stillness and the ability to slow down and be with my  process finally connected me to the depths of my practice, it has inspired me to spend the break from studying and listening to the written word that I am currently taking, getting into an active practice of embodied connection to the Goddess. This is a more feminine form of spiritual practice and is allowing me to grow closer to the feminine face of Source, it is strengthening my relationship to the Goddess and removing the barriers of a questioning mind. These barriers lifting is offering me a more innocent space of knowing my Creator. Outside of the realm of the mind lies the space of knowing, a simple gut awareness of my Divine Mother being with me and caring for me.
 
Collecting and offering my blood back to the Mother is my favoured way of doing this. The main benefits that I have received from this practice over the years are as follows:
 
  • An empowered relationship to my Moon flow. Every time that I lovingly collect my Moon flow and choose not to toss it into the garbage can, I am treating myself and my womanly flow with reverence and gratitude. The patriarchal shaming of my woman's blood is erased as I care for it in a sacred and holy way.
 
  • Time to reflect upon what it is that I am releasing each month, what I became conscious of over the past Moon cycle and what I am flowing rid of, this conscious awareness strengthens my ability to release and cleanse myself.
 
  • An example for my daughter, a living example. As she observes me over the years to come, her first impressions of a woman and her Moon time will be a magical, mysterious and joyful one.
 
  • An example for my Beloved husband, his relationship to the Moon and to the power that a woman holds within herself and within her Moon flow has increased exponentially as he has witnessed my flowing with the cycles of the Moon and observed the ritualized way that I have cared for my Moon blood.
 
  • A connection to my ancestors, to the Priestesses that have Priestessed before me, to the women that gathered in Red Tents to bleed into the Earth, to the Moon flow that has flowed through all women throughout time, I feel them close as I deepen my relationship to my Moon time. 
 
I began the process of collecting my blood organically and independently, it was after I began my practice that I met my Priestess that mentored me, that I connected to my Goddess group and began to learn about the phases of the Moon. My ritual around my Moon time has evolved over the years and I encourage every woman who feels called to deepen her relationship to her Moon time to also begin to collect her blood and to handle it in a reverent way in whatever way she feels called to. Listen to your gut, follow what feels right for you and listen to that. 
 
As a glimpse into my personal experience and as an offering to take anything that resonates with you, I have listed below a few ways that you can begin this process if you are looking for a place to start as well as an outline about how this practice might look. For those of you who already work with your Moon blood in a conscious way, please add any tips or rituals that you use below, I'd love to have some new inspiration!
 
  • This month send a prayer to the Goddess, ask for her to inspire you towards a beautiful, antique or powerful feeling container that will become your Moon blood womb.
 
  • When you have found your Moon container perform a ritual to sanctify it, set intention, say prayers over it, bless it with lavender or sweet grass and ask that the ancestors guide you in your journey with your Moon blood.
 
  • If you haven't already, look into purchasing some cloth Moon pads, making some, buying a Diva cup or a sponge tampon and cease to buy plastic, chemically laden disposable products. Whether a pad, cup or tampon you can easily collect your Moon blood during your next flow with one of these products.
 
  • Begin a Moon journal, the week before your Moon time begin to journal about everything that is irritating you, all that is frustrating, overwhelming and taxing to you. When your blood begins to flow, review what it is that you have written and release the energetic cause of your upsets with your monthly flow.
 
  • When you change your pad, cup or tampon rinse the blood into the womb container that you have chosen.
 
  • Once you have collected your blood, choose a ceremonial piece of clothing, a shawl, amulet or tunic and adorn yourself with it as you consciously and silently walk outdoors with your womb container and Moon blood (preferably barefoot).
 
  • When you step out onto the Earth pick a sacred spot that will be the place of receiving, say a prayer of thanks at this spot. Thank the Divine Mother for the blood that courses through you, for your ability to receive the Life Force, thank Her for receiving all that you no longer need and for purifying you through Her cycles.
 
  • Pour out your blood. Stand in silence. Be still. Be emptied.
 
  • Once you have released your blood return in the same fashion that you journeyed, place your womb container in it's sacred space and prepare to repeat this ritual each time that you change your pad, cup or tampon.
 
  • When your Moon time has ceased pour a little water into your womb container and keep it in the place that you have selected ready to receive all of you during your next Moon cycle.
 
As we women honour our Moon time and reclaim the power and beauty in our blood we rise up together, as sisters, mothers, aunties and grandmothers fully in our feminine power. When we offer what we shed back to the Great Mother our relationship to the Goddess strengthens as does the awareness of Her presence in our daily lives and the lives of those around us.
 
May our Moon times be held sacred and treated reverently from this day forward, may we embrace our cycles and may we become a spark of the Goddess as we honour and love our Moon times and may this practice bring us into alignment with the Divine Mother.
 
 
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly
 
 
 
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November, my touchstone.

As I feel the decent of the Sun's Scorpio energy falling down upon me I feel deeply grounded, calmed and for the first time during this past cycle of the wheel completely at ease. The Scorpio Sun is true to it's nature in that it is hidden behind dark clouds, felt but rarely seen at the end of this October month, becoming even darker as the Scorpion energy grows in strength throughout the November month. This upcoming month that leads me deeper into darker days and nights is my birth month. 

 
I am a Scorpio. I was born during this drab, chilly time of year. Growing up I wished for a different birthdate, one in which I could have pool parties with my friends, or Easter egg hunts, or bonfires in the field, it looked as though any month besides November proved to have an upside to it. I attended birthday parties for my friends who had been born during sunnier or more festive times and it seemed to me that November was just a grey, long month of empty hanging space, the time between Halloween (Samhain to me now) and Christmas (Yule), almost a place keeper between fun and celebration, a non~month if you will.
 
As I've grown up and entered my ministry as a Priestess I have found a deep fondness for this upcoming month, not only because it resonates so strongly with my phoenix soul, but also because this month of space is the month that I have found my magic, my mystery and most importantly my sense of greatest ease and comfort in.
 
Feminine Mysticism teaches me that what I experience outside of myself is a reflection of my inner state, when I cycle into the month of November my outsides reflects back to me what my inner self most needs. Space to be in the dark, quiet to explore the mystery and a stillness so still and so potent that my yin qi runs as cool as the icy wind outside of my window. 
 
I am called into the depths of my feminine self during this phase of the wheel. The patriarchy taught me to fear the dark, to recoil from the cold, to worship at the alter of fiery lighted masculine energy. It tried to push me away from my feminine nature and into a world that was flashy, fast and extreme. By the time the month of November rolled around there was no amount of patriarchy that could shield me from the dark cool nature of the Goddess.
 
The dark has been named spooky and spooky has been called evil, the dark was said to shield the faces of the evil spirits that haunted this realm, spirits that would try to steal your soul and send you to the underworld, to hell. Of course we know now that all of these deeply feminine aspects that were demonized in the patriarchy's overthrow of the Western world are in fact richly powerful and transformative qualities. 
 
The dark is the Goddess, She is the mystery, the void, the womb, the space of emptiness. November is Her month for me. November begins directly after the eve of Samhain, a night when the spirits of the ancestors are welcomed back through the thinned veil, a night when the spirit realm and the human walk closely beside each other. The next morning is the first day of November, November is entered once we have communed and reached through the veil of this realm and the next, that realm that the patriarchy tried to shield us form with tales of evil spirits and damned places called hell. (Remove an 'l' from hell and you have Hel the Goddess who rules Helheim, the realm of the dead).
 
In following the cycle of the wheel and growing through the spiral of the year I am left in this barren month with a keen awareness of the other realm, with an openness to explore the depths of my own darkness, my shadow self as well as my Divine Feminine. This month requires nothing more of me then to simply be with my powerful self. There is little comfort in this month outside of me, I must go within and even when I do I don't find the cozy cave of Winter's hibernation yet, I find an empty cave awaiting me, entreating me to fill it with all that I will need when the deep slumber of Winter arrives. My work is heavy, deep, intense and oh so fulfilling, it is the work of the Scorpio Goddess Archetype. When I enter the barren internal cave my arms are full from the harvest of September, my spirit is inspired from the time spent communing with the ancestors of Samhain and I am ready to create and to build.
 
In my internal cave I first lay out my crystal ball, my Goddess cards, my pendulum, I am ready to go deep, I am ready to be magic. I lie out fur rugs to keep me warm in the upcoming months, yet for now I wrap my shawl around my shoulders and prepare to sit down, to gaze into the crystal ball before me and to align myself with my deepest highest self. This is my metaphoric journey that happens during the month of Scorpio. Each year the experience is different and each year I look forward to being in my astrological essence a little more.
 
There have been many tools that I've used over the Novembers of my life, some that have taken me into the sadness of my inner darkness, some that have lit up my spiritual juice, and others that have led me bravely through the dark nights of my soul and brought me face to face with my shadow self. All of these November's have been rich and deep fertilizer for my life's work. 
 
As my cycles become more conscious I can look back and see what has helped me align and what has brought me out of alignment during these periods of my life, I have found that : 
 
  • over~sharing 'senses' that I am picking up, inspirations that are descending upon me and any other seed of internal knowing that has not had time to take root whisks away chances for deep and meaningful work.
 
  • over~scheduling myself with activities, social engagements and work keeps me buoyed to the surface of life during a time when the tides of the Ocean are ripe to pull me down, deep into Her depths.
 
  • over~caffeinating myself keeps me jittery and unable to tap into the inner stillness that connects me to my inner Goddess self.
 
  • over~eating processed and junk foods make me feel zoned out and lethargic during this dark month.
 
When I remain aware of what hasn't worked for me in the past and stay committed to that which has:
 
  • holding sacred silence, secrecy, a sense of reverence for the mystery that slowly wells up within my womb space, my inner cauldron, my intuitive gut. This sacred silence gives me the space to digest the spiritual messages that I receive at this time and allows them to germinate and to take root within during Winter's hibernation.
 
  • journalling, lucid dreaming, meditation, prayer, yoga. Internal, solitary activities that slow me down and open me up to receiving the potency of the mystery that enshrouds this month.
 
  • this is the time of year when herbs, tinctures, teas, tonics and ciders awaken me to my Priestess self. Earthy potions that nourish my qi and warm me from the inside out keep my inner fires lit during the dark, damp days of November.
 
  • hearty meals, stews, soups, potatoes all keep me grounded as the waters of Scorpio and the winds of the Autumn season call on me to dive deep into the intuitive waters and to rise high into the ethers of my third eye. Earthy foods, cooked at home help to sustain and strengthen my physical vessel as it is stretched wide open and laid at the altar of the Spirit realm.
 
Through utilizing the above tools and avoiding some of the hindrances I am prepared to let go and to just be fully Scorpio, fully in my Priestess self, in my magic and in my glory.
 
Where I once only felt at home in the dark, autumnal season, I now am able to enjoy the flavours of each season, each month, each cycle of the wheel. Once I began to consciously merge with my birth month I found my home base in the calendar year. I am comforted throughout the other cycles of the wheel, ones that feel busier, lighter, more frivolous than my Scorpio nature is at ease in, knowing that my cycle of the year is on it's way. Once I began to allow myself to be present with whatever cycle of the year I was in and to soak up what each cycle had to offer I was able to become more integrated into my life experience. Rather than hiding away from the bright Sun, or shielding myself from the delicate nature of Spring, I could experiment with dancing in different energies knowing that my time would come with the advent of the Autumn season. I have learnt to be light, to have fun, to be engaged in the manifestation process, always with the comfort of coming home to my November month.
 
I suspect that each of us is most at home with one particular month of the year, for some it may be their birth month, the Gemini's ready to dance and play in June's new Sun, the Capricorns prepared to share their traditional stories around the fire in the dark of a January night and the Taurus' ready for romance and sweets as the buds of spring bloom. These birth months are like our touchstones, our yearly energetic imprints, the space where we are the most comfortable in our own skins this comfort fortifies us so that we may be true to ourselves throughout the rest of the year as we journey out of our comfort zone. The more we can soak up our month, birth month or other, the easier it becomes to open up and to integrate the essence of each month, we can integrate :
 
January's sense of traditions and wisdom, with
February's forward thinking and wild rebellion, with
March's inspired creativity, with
April's bright burst of excitement and energy, with
May's romance, sweetness and blossoming, with
June's busy fun times, with
July's motherly warm embrace, with
August's extroverted loud expression, with
September's dedicated harvesting, with
October's discernment and communion, with
November's openness, space and stillness, with
December's joy and exuberance.
 
As you connect to the month that resonates the most with who you are and strengthen that foundational self, soon you will find, as I have, that the dance from open space of spirit in the dark month to the romance and sweetness in the light month are not as far apart as they once were, the integration of all of the month's energies connect you to your whole self and in the light of this whole self a greater awareness of the One Goddess within everything and everyone begins to dawn.
 
I revel in this integration, and send up a prayer of thanks to the Goddess that my time, my true north month is almost here, I pray November inspires and brings as much magic to you as it has to me throughout the November's of my life.
 
Grace Be With You,
Priestess of Grace,
Candise Soaring Butterfly
 
 
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Recent Comments - Show all comments
  • Candise
    Candise says #
    Thank you Molly, I'd love to hear more about your 'overs'
  • Molly
    Molly says #
    Your first two "overs" are so familiar to me! This was a great post. Thank you.
  • Candise
    Candise says #
    Sister! You're my opposite month. It took me so long to be at ease in the Spring, I felt like a fraud, the light was so revealing,
  • Michele Murphy
    Michele Murphy says #
    Beautiful post. I love this idea of the dark mysterious time being that of the feminine. Although I am a spring baby, I love the f

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