Sedna’s Daughters: Healing from Family Estrangement

Families in patriarchal cultures often mete out similar types of domination and oppression on their daughters that women experience in the larger world. For many daughters (and sons/trans/genderqueer folks), this includes scapegoating and rejection. Sedna’s Daughters provides a safe space for discussion on earth-based, spiritual approaches to healing from the confusing experience of family estrangement and recognizes all people's inherent belonging to Mother Earth, the human family, and the cosmos.

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Sedna’s Daughters

Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs

Welcome to the Sedna’s Daughters’ Blog, Home to Women Helping Women recover from Family Aggression and Rejection!

Sedna’s Daughters has had a virtual presence on the web since March of 2015, as well as a Facebook page, and now we have entered the Blogosphere to reach more daughters. This blog will present a forum to discuss, and bring out of the closet, the many daughters who suffer from Family Aggression. Sadly, many women are estranged from or have been rejected by their families, biological and adopted. Since its debut, hundreds of women have visited the website and many left their stories of shock, despair, courage, and healing about their experiences of family rejection. Here is the link.

With the current #metoo and #timesup movements in America that provide an international forum for women to speak out about sexual harassment, Sedna’s Daughters creates a similar space for daughters to raise awareness about Family Violence Against Women.

Family Violence Against Women is a family’s pattern of power and control meant to oppress, disenfranchise, and denigrate their daughter—scapegoat her for the family’s problems, cut her off from all family contact, and punish family members who maintain contact with the daughter. Family Violence is a form of Mobbing, a strategic pattern of hostility that happens at the workplace against a targeted employee, which is actually illegal.

Because there is no open, national dialogue about Family Violence Against Women, daughters who are shunned suffer in isolation while the people who are supposed to love them wage a campaign of hostility throughout her family, her children, her community, even her professional network. In some countries, Family Violence takes on the extreme expression of Honor-Based Violence that takes the lives of 5,000 daughters annually (some in America). Family Aggression against daughters is an international problem that is not discussed as a widespread cultural pattern. At Sedna’s Daughters, we get to the point: all violence against women (and men and trans people) is wrong. Family Aggression is wrong—it is not “just normal”, just “everybody has a messed up family.” No, they don’t. Family Rejection is violence.

Like Intimate Partner Violence from a partner or spouse, Family Aggression against daughters is done in secret to the daughter by her entire family unit. Instead of an individual partner enacting the pattern of power and control though, most of (if not all) the daughter’s family participates in it. But unlike domestic violence, Family Violence against daughters is NOT condemned by our society. Instead, daughters are expected to endure abuse, continue to be the family slave, and deny their own experiences that often cripple their own lives. When daughters speak up to family members about the ill-treatment, they are scapegoated as “crazy” or “trouble-makers”. This is part of the pattern of abuse.

What daughters ask me over and over again is: “Why? How could my own family do this to me?” This, and much more, will be discussed in this blog.

Whether you have been rejected by your family or someone you love has been rejected, the purpose of this blog is to inform, empower, and draw women who have been shunned to the undeniable reality that they are still whole, still loved, even though their families failed them because of the underlying violence built into patriarchal cultures.

Ancestors walk at our side encouraging. Mother Earth and the Luminaries support us at every moment. Animal companions provide unconditional love. Angels whisper in our ears that they believe, so onward we go, together. I am your fellow-traveler, and a survivor of family shunning, who will be at your side through the journey of healing from Family Rejection, believing in you and celebrating your triumphs as you recover, move on, celebrate your strengths, and see yourself as whole, complete, and utterly loved by this beautiful world we live in.

Many daughters who were cut-off by their families are already on the other side of the valley—their hands are open to us. Let’s reach for them. Love, Always, Sedna XO

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I have a Ph.D., am a victim's advocate, college-level educator, and was shunned by my maternal biological kin and their family friends over a decade ago. I have built an international community of daughters (and sons) committed to supporting one another and thriving despite the aggression of our relatives. “Sedna” is the EuroAmerican name of a revered Inuit Creatrix who was violently rejected by her parents and cast into the sea to die, but instead survived to create otters, seals, and whales.  Sedna is also the name of a star just appearing in the farthest reaches of our solar system and discovered by astronomers on November 14, 2003. Nick Anthony Fiorenza writes that "Sedna's message here is that humanity must recognize the truth about the suppression, persecution, abduction and exploitation of the feminine force in the world; and this mentality perpetuating such must be addressed and changed." Healing women is my life's work. See my Facebook Page at https://www.facebook.com/SednasD/

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