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Welcome! This post is part of the Mabon 2018 Tarot Blog Hop. You can hop all the posts by clicking on the NEXT link up top. Or you can go the other way by clicking PREVIOUS. If you get lost, just click MAIN to find a blog that sounds interesting.

Stolen Heart's Shadow

Glimpsed it just there in the small stream of sun

We've had an interesting first day of September here on the eastern plains of New Mexico. From a bright and sunny morning to a dust storm cum rainstorm to an ominous sky just now. Those are the worst as they can produce mud. I've never seen one, but I read an old newspaper story about one. Folks said it coated their windows.

I've been thinking a lot about my inconsistencies with blogging and journaling. I used to be very dedicated to both. I guess as the seasons and years have passed, I've changed. I want to get back to it so this is my attempt. 

Lammas is a very special holiday for me. It is the date of my dedication (I still have a picture somewhere). It is also a baking holiday. I love to bake although I haven't indulge in a while. And, for me, Sabbats are about community.

It seems fitting that I should mention our Tarot Blog Hops. These were started in direct response to someone's...let's just say bad behaviour and leave it at that. I thought it would be a better reaction to band together with those who believed in community rather than join in the mob (well justified!) attack on that bad behaviour.

For the first time, but not the last, I attended Readers Studio. In my mind, this was always THE Tarot conference to attend. But I never did. I came up with all sorts of excuses as to why not. I didn't have the vacation. I couldn't afford it. But the underlying reason for every excuse and variation of excuse was this. I wasn't Tarot enough.

I'm not even sure what that means now after having been there. It has threads of inadequacy, low self-esteem, comparison monsters, and so many other negative self-thoughts. I began to unravel those at the NorthWest Tarot Symposium which was my first Tarot conference (and first time to present at a conference of my peers.) This year I went to NWTS for the second time and RS for the first. 

I do celebrate Mother's Day for those who are mothers in my world. I do not celebrate it for myself. For me, it is a time of grief. You see, I was blessed with one of those wickedly funny Southern mamas you hear about. Mine was a firecracker when she got wound up. She was a fierce defender of her family. She was also a Catholic who loved her Wiccan child. I tend to shy away from the concept of being blessed, but in this I was. 

Why Tarot? Why not astrology? Or numerology? Or any of the other divination tools? Why did I choose Tarot?