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They call it the “high priestess effect."

You've been there before. It may not have been the worst ritual in the world, but it was somewhere Down There among the Bottom Thirteen. People walk out of the circle feeling bored, irritable, imbalanced.

All but the high priestess, that is. She's giddy with excitement. She thought the ritual was masterful, one of the best ever.

Premise: If you want to know how a ritual really went, don't ask the high priestess.

The sad fact of the matter is that when you're leading a ritual—especially one that you wrote yourself—your perception of the ritual will be both qualitatively and quantitatively different from those of the other folks present. You have a level of investment and engagement that they simply don't. That fact must inevitably shape the experience.

It's not quite fair to put these parallax views down to incompetency: not entirely, anyway. Perhaps it's a matter of experience, really. Experienced priestesses—priests too, of course—know about the High Priestess Effect and understand that they need to temper their own reactions accordingly. The experienced priestess (or priest) knows that, of all the people in the circle, his/her experience of the ritual is the least important. The right to your own experience is one of the sacrifices that you make when you enter the priesthood.

Moral of the Story: From inside and outside, the same ritual looks very different.

“Beginnings and endings are so very sacred, to give honor to all that has transpired, every experience, every joy, every pain, is a doorway to the magical. Hold your entire year between your hands, every day, every thought, every breath. Now bless it with gratitude, love and humility. You have done more to transform this new year than a thousand resolutions.” 

 –K. Allen Kay

“Drinking the water, I thought how earth and sky are generous with their gifts and how good it is to receive them. Most of us are taught, somehow, about giving and accepting human gifts, but not about opening ourselves and our bodies to welcome the sun, the land, the visions of sky and dreaming, not about standing in the rain ecstatic with what is offered.”

–Linda Hogan in Sisters of the Earth

“Women’s circles and mother-daughter circles are perhaps the most powerful agents of change on the planet right now, with each woman contributing to the healing of our world as she herself experiences healing.”

–Amy Bammel Wilding

I stand rooted here on the earth and offer my gratitude.
I turn to the East and offer gratitude for the air I breathe.
I turn to the South and offer gratitude for the fire of my spirit.
I turn to the West and offer gratitude for river, lake, stream, and ocean.
I turn to the North and offer gratitude for stone, tree, and bone.
I touch the earth and offer gratitude for this land I call home.
I reach towards the sky and offer gratitude for sun and stars.
I place my hand on my heart and breathe deep,
offering gratitude for all that I am and all that I have
and for the many blessings of my life.

Thank you.

You are enough.

Our updated Gratitude Ritual Kit is available for you here.

And, our Winter Magic class has begun and is free too!

I spent some time with the new Three Cauldrons layout that is included in the ritual kit and my results were so perfect. I DO need freedom, hearth-tending, and making sacred/blessing as the core components of keeping my cauldrons tended. I actually laughed aloud when I saw the Wand show up in my “Contribution” cauldron.

The Three Cauldrons are those of Vitality, Connection, and Contribution.