PaganSquare


PaganSquare is a community blog space where Pagans can discuss topics relevant to the life and spiritual practice of all Pagans.

  • Home
    Home This is where you can find all the blog posts throughout the site.
  • Tags
    Tags Displays a list of tags that have been used in the blog.
  • Bloggers
    Bloggers Search for your favorite blogger from this site.
  • Login
    Login Login form
Subscribe to this list via RSS Blog posts tagged in satire

Posted by on in Culture Blogs
Letter to Nancy Pelosi

Representative:

I don't know whether or not you follow the series Game of Thrones.

Regardless, you should know that we're going to rebuild the Wall.

And we're going to get the White Walkers to pay for it.

Last modified on

Posted by on in Culture Blogs
Brand Spanking New

Brand spanking new.

A curious expression, certainly: what does one have to do with the other?

In fact, it's birth imagery. Birth imagery? you might think.

Ah, but this was birth the cowan way.

Back in the Bad Old Days of the Cowan Era (CE), it was customary to hold newborn babies upside-down by their feet and give them a good, solid swat on the behind. Supposedly, this was to get the newborn to take its first breath.

In fact, of course, most newborns breathe automatically, and for those that don't, there are much less violent methods available.

But for cowans, the gesture held deep meaning. At the very moment of birth, it subjected the newly-born to the life of indignity, violence, and subjugation that most people then could expect to live.

Last modified on
Recent Comments - Show all comments
  • Anne Newkirk Niven
    Anne Newkirk Niven says #
    I delivered all three of my boys at home with a midwife, and believe me, there was no spanking involved! It hadn't occurred to me
  • Shirl Sazynski
    Shirl Sazynski says #
    Unfortunately, Steven, it hasn't. Not if you enter a typical maternity ward rather than a birth center. I deeply appreciate your a

Posted by on in Culture Blogs
How Pagan Are You?

1. How many Green Men do you have in your house? (Score: 1 point per Green Man)

2. If they needed a sacrifice, would you volunteer?

a. No.

b. Yes.

c. Where do I sign up?

3. Which of the following books have you read?

a. The Mists of Avalon.

b. The Triumph of the Moon.

c. The White Goddess.

Last modified on
White House to Host Beltane Celebration Sunday

AP: Washington, D. C.

The White House announced Wednesday that it will host the nation's first presidential Beltane celebration since the 1920s, on Sunday, May 7.

“Wiccans will be flying in from all over the country,” press secretary Sean Spicer told reporters. “On planes, mostly.”

“I ♥ Wiccans,” tweeted acting President Ronald Rump later in the day. "They're amazing people, amazing."

A White House spokesman later offered a clarification, indicating that the president was actually referring to Presbyterians.

Last modified on

Posted by on in Culture Blogs
Prince William Initiated Into Coven

AP: London

Palace sources confirmed today that Prince William, eventual heir to the British throne, was recently initiated into a local Windsor coven.

“The Duke of Cambridge's interest in the Old Ways is of both a long-standing and a deeply personal nature,” a spokesman said, while requesting that the prince's “spiritual privacy” be respected.

According to Rowan Williams, former Archbishop of Canterbury, this initiation in no way conflicts with the prince's likely future standing as “Defender of the [Anglican] Faith.”

“He would certainly not be the first King of England to maintain the Old Faith along with the New,” he said on Friday.

Smiling, he added: “Haven't you ever heard of the 'King of the Witches'?”

Last modified on
'Pagan' Website Revealed as Front for 'Islamic State'

AP: Washington, DC

Even in a year of fake news, it came as something of a surprise 

The FBI revealed today that the popular PaganSquare blogsite is actually a front for the so-called 'Islamic State' (IS).

'For propaganda purposes, it was a brilliant stroke,' said an FBI source, who spoke under condition of anonymity.

'What better way to fuel global jihad than to convince would-be jihadis that the West is undergoing a resurgence in paganism?'

According to the Qur'an, Jews and Christians are protected religious minorities, but pagans must choose between conversion to Islam or death.

Documents found at IS headquarters in a recently-retaken section of Mosul in Iraq definitively confirmed the connection.

Last modified on
Meatless Diets Promote Climate Change, Warns Scientist

AP: Minneapolis, Minnesota

You may have heard that the single most important thing that you can do to reduce your carbon footprint is to become vegan or vegetarian.

Not so, says Dr. Stanley Friehl of the University of Paganistan's School of Bio-Chemistry.

In an article in the current issue of Scientific American, Friehl suggests that the average plant-based diet actually increases the amount of greenhouse-gas emission.

“Admittedly, meat is bad for the environment,” writes Friehl.

“But while it's true that reducing the amount of meat that you consume will significantly lower carbon emission, studies show that giving up meat is actually worse for the environment,” he adds.

While this conclusion may seem counter-intuitive, the fact that the average vegan or vegetarian is far more likely to consume greater quantities of pulses—beans, peas, and lentils—than the average practicing omnivore, means that they in turn emit higher amounts of methane.

Last modified on

Additional information