Paganistan: Notes from the Secret Commonwealth

In Which One Midwest Man-in-Black Confers, Converses & Otherwise Hob-Nobs with his Fellow Hob-Men (& -Women) Concerning the Sundry Ways of the Famed but Ill-Starred Tribe of Witches.

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Stupid Question, Stupid Answer

“What part of their bodies do men dry off first when they get out of the shower?”

“Hunh?” I reply inelegantly, thoroughly lost.

My friend explains.

“We noticed in the bathhouse this morning that when a woman gets out of the shower, the first thing she dries off is her face, so I was wondering about men.”

The observation is an interesting one, certainly. I'm embarrassed to admit that I'd never really thought about it before, but when you're wet all over, of course you dry your face first. Just what this may say about our species, I'll leave you to suss out for yourself.

But the act of “othering” inherent in her question annoyed me, not to mention the sexism. I figured that a stupid question deserves a stupid answer.

“We dry off our dicks first,” I tell her.




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Tagged in: sexism
Poet, scholar and storyteller Steven Posch was raised in the hardwood forests of western Pennsylvania by white-tailed deer. (That's the story, anyway.) He emigrated to Paganistan in 1979 and by sheer dint of personality has become one of Lake Country's foremost men-in-black. He is current keeper of the Minnesota Ooser.


  • Anthony Gresham
    Anthony Gresham Sunday, 03 March 2019

    I dry off my hair first so the water doesn't run into my face.

  • Erin Lale
    Erin Lale Sunday, 03 March 2019

    lol I thought I dried my face first because I wear glasses and I want to put them on right away. I didn't know people who don't wear glasses do it too!

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