Shortly after my mom died, the goddess Sigyn told me our relationship would change soon. She did not elaborate, but I did not have long to wait.

(To recap: I became sworn to Freya in college, and Freya gave me to Sigyn a few years ago.) About a week or so after mom passed on, Sigyn told me I was free. She assured me that she would always be part of my life, and she would help me through my grief and would still send butterflies sometimes, but I no longer belong to her. I would never need her again the same way I needed her while caring for mom. This is a grief unlike any other. I would now grow closer to another goddess.

It did not take long until I learned who. More on that in my next post.

Sigyn came back strongly to help me through a particular ritual. Some background: I've done animal funerals that included burial, including at least a couple that I knew were intended as practice for me to do the same for a human later. But my mom had herself cremated. She had always said she wanted her ashes scattered, and that's not functionally different from burial, so that would be very similar ritually.That is, burial or scattering ashes both end up with the remains outside, in the earth, or on the earth, or in the water.

But when mom had arranged for her cremation she had also bought two mini urns, one for me and one for my brother, so that we would each have a permanent bit of her ashes. She still wanted the rest of her ashes scattered. So, I realized I had to be prepared to actually keep some of her body, not just bury or scatter it all. I was not sure how to do that. I mean, I was not yet mentally prepared to do that. Sigyn came to me and helped me practice an appropriate ritual.

Years ago, I had received a butterfly to keep, by finding it dead in my back yard. I had been keeping it in a temporary container, a cup, inside the glass wall shrine that I call the spiritual souvenir display. I needed to give it a permanent home, and do so ritually, so that I would know what to do when mom's ashes arrive. When I brought a truckload of my mom's things to donate to a local thrift shop, I also went inside and I found a lovely glass case decorated with a lavender colored flower, and I knew that was just right for the butterfly's permanent home.

Image: Butterfly in glass case, teacup, tea container, vase with lavender flower. Also in the photo are some candles, a jar of the petals of the Prank Rose which I received as a sign from Sigyn, a butterfly representation, a matchbook and match receptacle, and a vase with some fading flowers left from bouquets brought to my mom's wake.